I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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