we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
