Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Randomize
