Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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