my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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