i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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