i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
