I wish you could order shots online.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Randomize
