Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize
