it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Randomize
