i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Randomize
