Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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