So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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