She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
