Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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