This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
