Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize