8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
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