yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
