He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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