...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
