Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
i will never coherently bang her
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize