I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
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