Midget sex pt 2 tonight
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
