i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
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