i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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