You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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