Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
