butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize