Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
