I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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