Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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