You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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