I'm going to jail i love you
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
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