I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
