please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
