we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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