Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
