smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize