He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
