Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
