If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
