Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize