Soap is not a condiment
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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