Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I am one with the molecules
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize