I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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