I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize