Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
