Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
areolas are like halos for boobs.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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