alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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