Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
You have to summon your inner elephant
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
