And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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