I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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